After a doctor appointment this afternoon, I checked my phone which I’d set to ‘silent’ before I went in. Six missed calls and three urgent messages, this can’t be good. I played the messages;
First message, “Uh Mom, this is Pip. Yah, all the students and staff are being evacuated because of some kind of bomb threat or something. I don’t know where we’re going, but I love you and I’ll talk to you later.” Uhhhhh,,,,,,,,,WHAT WAS THAT?! My heart stopped, scenes of Columbine, 911, theater massacres all went flashing through my brain . Next message, “Um, Hi Mom, this is Pip again. Yeah it’s definitely a bomb threat and not a drill, they’ve evacuated us and won’t let anyone leave. There are police and helicopters and everything. Gotta go, love youuuuuu, talk to you later.” And the blood that had stopped flowing suddenly started again, pounding, pulsing ten times harder and faster than normal to all parts of my body at once, was I going to fain? My ears were ringing and I had to tell myself to breathe. Next message, “Yeah, it’s me again. Since it’s after school hours they’ll start letting us go, kids with parents and rides first, walkers last, but we can’t go back to the school so I can’t get my bike. I don’t want to go home alone and don’t know when you’ll be done so I’m going to a friend’s house. Love you!” A fourth message had beeped in during the playing of the last one. This new message was a message from the school principal. “This is such and such, principal at such and such high school. At 1:30 this afternoon we became aware of a legitimate bomb threat to the school. The students and staff were quickly and safely evacuated to the nearby football field within minutes . The police are still in control of the campus and no one is allowed to return. Students are being released to parents and those walking will be released last and have been advised to head home immediately. All students may pick up their personal belongings on Monday morning. “ I was numb. My phone rang. I said “Hello” to my daughter’s voice, I was trembling. I was frightened, shocked and didn’t couldn’t think where to start. Pip told me she was safe and where I could pick her up, she suggested tonight might be a good night for cookie dough. Yes, cookie dough. Every fiber and cell in my body wanted to race to her. Ten deep breathes. Still not good. Called my other daughter on speaker phone as I was driving to get Pip. No answer. Ten more deep breathes, called my son on speaker phone, he answered and I let it gush. I was panicked and it needed venting. That helped, he’s a great listener AND he’s a parent so he gets it. Pip called through to find out how I close I was, I was nearly there. I turned up the street her girlfriend lives on and had to pull over to get a grip on myself. Next thing I knew Pip and her friend were standing at the window. They said their good-byes and she got in. We just looked at each other for a loooong moment then I grabbed her and held her, still fighting tears. Finally she said, “Uh, this isn’t the place for hugging Mom, can we go home now please.” Whew. Kiss on the top of her sweet head and we started off.
The story of her afternoon unfolded. First she reminded me the school has drills all the time. But this afternoon, a woman came over the speaker and said “All staff are to evacuate their students immediately off campus following emergency protocol. This is NOT a drill.” The message was repeated. “Well of course we didn’t know what KIND of emergency it was,” she said, “they didn’t use the fire alarm. They didn’t use the GunMan on Campus alarm” – “What? GunMan on Campus alarm?!” “Yeah, we have a special alarm and protocol for Gun Man on Campus.” She looked at me like how can you not know this? Probably because when I was in school the only emergency alarms or drills we ever had were for fires! I was unnerved. An actual GunMan On Campus drill. Holy CRAP! And she looked at me like this was as common as a latte from Starbucks. This is part of school life for our children in this country since Columbine and all massacres after. Children killing children, bomb threats, terrorists, bullying – its disgraceful and terrifying when our children are calm about GunMan On Campus drills. Add that to all the “normal” pressures (peer, drugs, gangs, sex, body/hormonal changes and status) of high school, it’s no wonder so many of our young people are stressed, anxious and depressed. It’s scary to go to school! And here I’ve been thinking, yes, some things have changed since I was in high school, but its still pretty much the same. No - it’s really not. These kids today deal with far more than I could have ever imagined. She talked the whole way home about the eventful afternoon. She knew I wasn’t ok and she tried to help me be. She was also distressed that she had to leave her brand new book on her desk, one she was looking forward to reading this weekend for fun. Her little face was pitiful when she realized everything that was in her back pack locked down at school – her make-up, her best drawing pencil, the drawings she was looking forward to showing me, her CHAPSTICK (that’s big time crisis right there, 17 and a whole weekend without chapstick – Mom do you know CPR?), her hairbrush! How will we manage?! Oh wait – NO HOMEWORK! YEAH I CAN READ! CRAP – NO I CAN’T! Whew what a ride we are on.
At home, she let me hold her. She held me back. I couldn’t stop with the random hug attacks and she handled it well – bless her . One of her friends called. Her parents had gone out and left her home. She wanted to come hang out, maybe take Pip and go to a movie. Pip told her she didn’t think I’d let her go tonight. I know, completely illogical of me, but I couldn’t help it. Emotionally I needed her close tonight. I think its pretty darn cool Pip recognized that without me having to say it, normally I’m the ‘yes’ Mom. I asked her friend if her Mom was freaked out too. “Yeah, she freaked, couldn’t stop hugging me either.” Nice to know I’m not alone in the freak out department tonight.
Her friend stayed for a while and we talked. THEY talked about their day, they talked and talked, I listened and learned what it was like to be in their shoes for a day. I hope they never have to know what it felt like to be in mine.
First message, “Uh Mom, this is Pip. Yah, all the students and staff are being evacuated because of some kind of bomb threat or something. I don’t know where we’re going, but I love you and I’ll talk to you later.” Uhhhhh,,,,,,,,,WHAT WAS THAT?! My heart stopped, scenes of Columbine, 911, theater massacres all went flashing through my brain . Next message, “Um, Hi Mom, this is Pip again. Yeah it’s definitely a bomb threat and not a drill, they’ve evacuated us and won’t let anyone leave. There are police and helicopters and everything. Gotta go, love youuuuuu, talk to you later.” And the blood that had stopped flowing suddenly started again, pounding, pulsing ten times harder and faster than normal to all parts of my body at once, was I going to fain? My ears were ringing and I had to tell myself to breathe. Next message, “Yeah, it’s me again. Since it’s after school hours they’ll start letting us go, kids with parents and rides first, walkers last, but we can’t go back to the school so I can’t get my bike. I don’t want to go home alone and don’t know when you’ll be done so I’m going to a friend’s house. Love you!” A fourth message had beeped in during the playing of the last one. This new message was a message from the school principal. “This is such and such, principal at such and such high school. At 1:30 this afternoon we became aware of a legitimate bomb threat to the school. The students and staff were quickly and safely evacuated to the nearby football field within minutes . The police are still in control of the campus and no one is allowed to return. Students are being released to parents and those walking will be released last and have been advised to head home immediately. All students may pick up their personal belongings on Monday morning. “ I was numb. My phone rang. I said “Hello” to my daughter’s voice, I was trembling. I was frightened, shocked and didn’t couldn’t think where to start. Pip told me she was safe and where I could pick her up, she suggested tonight might be a good night for cookie dough. Yes, cookie dough. Every fiber and cell in my body wanted to race to her. Ten deep breathes. Still not good. Called my other daughter on speaker phone as I was driving to get Pip. No answer. Ten more deep breathes, called my son on speaker phone, he answered and I let it gush. I was panicked and it needed venting. That helped, he’s a great listener AND he’s a parent so he gets it. Pip called through to find out how I close I was, I was nearly there. I turned up the street her girlfriend lives on and had to pull over to get a grip on myself. Next thing I knew Pip and her friend were standing at the window. They said their good-byes and she got in. We just looked at each other for a loooong moment then I grabbed her and held her, still fighting tears. Finally she said, “Uh, this isn’t the place for hugging Mom, can we go home now please.” Whew. Kiss on the top of her sweet head and we started off.
The story of her afternoon unfolded. First she reminded me the school has drills all the time. But this afternoon, a woman came over the speaker and said “All staff are to evacuate their students immediately off campus following emergency protocol. This is NOT a drill.” The message was repeated. “Well of course we didn’t know what KIND of emergency it was,” she said, “they didn’t use the fire alarm. They didn’t use the GunMan on Campus alarm” – “What? GunMan on Campus alarm?!” “Yeah, we have a special alarm and protocol for Gun Man on Campus.” She looked at me like how can you not know this? Probably because when I was in school the only emergency alarms or drills we ever had were for fires! I was unnerved. An actual GunMan On Campus drill. Holy CRAP! And she looked at me like this was as common as a latte from Starbucks. This is part of school life for our children in this country since Columbine and all massacres after. Children killing children, bomb threats, terrorists, bullying – its disgraceful and terrifying when our children are calm about GunMan On Campus drills. Add that to all the “normal” pressures (peer, drugs, gangs, sex, body/hormonal changes and status) of high school, it’s no wonder so many of our young people are stressed, anxious and depressed. It’s scary to go to school! And here I’ve been thinking, yes, some things have changed since I was in high school, but its still pretty much the same. No - it’s really not. These kids today deal with far more than I could have ever imagined. She talked the whole way home about the eventful afternoon. She knew I wasn’t ok and she tried to help me be. She was also distressed that she had to leave her brand new book on her desk, one she was looking forward to reading this weekend for fun. Her little face was pitiful when she realized everything that was in her back pack locked down at school – her make-up, her best drawing pencil, the drawings she was looking forward to showing me, her CHAPSTICK (that’s big time crisis right there, 17 and a whole weekend without chapstick – Mom do you know CPR?), her hairbrush! How will we manage?! Oh wait – NO HOMEWORK! YEAH I CAN READ! CRAP – NO I CAN’T! Whew what a ride we are on.
At home, she let me hold her. She held me back. I couldn’t stop with the random hug attacks and she handled it well – bless her . One of her friends called. Her parents had gone out and left her home. She wanted to come hang out, maybe take Pip and go to a movie. Pip told her she didn’t think I’d let her go tonight. I know, completely illogical of me, but I couldn’t help it. Emotionally I needed her close tonight. I think its pretty darn cool Pip recognized that without me having to say it, normally I’m the ‘yes’ Mom. I asked her friend if her Mom was freaked out too. “Yeah, she freaked, couldn’t stop hugging me either.” Nice to know I’m not alone in the freak out department tonight.
Her friend stayed for a while and we talked. THEY talked about their day, they talked and talked, I listened and learned what it was like to be in their shoes for a day. I hope they never have to know what it felt like to be in mine.