I'm prone to periodic kidney infections and ovarian cysts. The cysts have required decades of maintenance medication and several surgeries. For months now, I've been suspicious there is a new significant growth. My approach has been, "if I ignore it, maybe it will go away". Don't laugh, sometimes this works. For two days now, I've felt that familiar pain that comes with a kidney infection. By yesterday afternoon I was on the verge of vomiting and nearly doubled over. Still, I refused to go the ER.
Why? Because, there are only two hospitals in this area who take “The Poor Man’s” medical coverage – and the one I’m supposed to go is always packed! Patients aren’t seen on a ‘first come first served' basis. Patients are treated "most urgent need first". Which makes sense. But in an area this size, there's always someone else who is sicker than you or more wounded. Unless you've been stabbed in the face, severed an artery, misplaced your head, arm or leg, you aren't going to be seen expeditiously. People who just "don't feel good" wait. I'm talking SERIOUS WAIT. No one gets out of there - dead or alive - in anything under 12 hours! Been there a couple times myself (my appendix ruptured before they saw me and that was after almost 11 hours of waiting in pain) and with others and I know it’s true. And 12 hours is considered ‘making good time’! People get pissed, really pissed. This is the only place in the hospital (or any other hospital I've been in) with 2 inch thick bullet proof glass at the reception area and multiple armed security guards. No lie, no exaggeration.
The people behind the reception glass know you're going to be there till the turn of the century. They know you're in pain. They know you will get even more uncomfortable and lose your patience long before you are actually seen. They know you will want to shoot them before your ordeal is over. AND they know they're protected by bullet proof glass. Their concern is minimal. As soon as you're done registering, before you can ask, they say, “The bathroom is down the hall to your left, no eating allowed in the waiting area and have a seat if you can find one.” Without looking at you directly they continue, “If your name is called and you miss it, you will be moved to the bottom of the list. Do not come back to this window, we cannot help you. NEXT!" So right off you know you're going to be there long enough to need a bathroom and get hungry. You also know you better not miss your name. And you know you have no recourse if you wet your pants. So now you're sick and paranoid.
The waiting area has a seating capacity of 50 (I counted). It’s standing room only with glassy eyed people who are bleeding, coughing and spewing out all manner of toxicity, holding barf bags, crying or who have long since died and are staring off into space while waiting for someone to notice. The seats, if you get one, are old, flimsy and hard – let us not waste money on comfortable seating here! They are bolted together in sets of ten - two sets of fives back to back. Being thus, you can feel the slightest bounce, jolt and movement of any one of the other nine people you're connected to.
I called my primary care doctor early this afternoon. Two issues, ovary and kidney. "So sorry, we can't see you for both conditions in the same appointment.” “Huh? Are you serious?” “One is reproductive and the other is general, has to be two separate appointments." *does anyone out there have an explanation for this stupidness?!
"What? Two separate issues?! Both parts are in the same body! The whole body will be present at the time of the exam. Why can't I have both parts checked at the same time?"
"I'm sorry, I'm just an answering service Ma'am, I can't answer that. We have July 12th and July 24th available, would you like to schedule those two days?"
"Are you kidding me?! July 12th is in two weeks! I'm in pain – NOW, TODAY! Both parts hurt today! I'll take any physician available today." My mind was reeling with the stupidity of what I'd just heard.
"Sorry Ma'am, our first opening is July 12th. If you are in pain, I suggest you go to the emergency room."
"I could DIE WAITING in the emergency room!"
"Ah, I see you've already been to our emergency room. In that case, may I suggest a ‘walk-in' visit here?"
"What day, what time?" I asked flatly. "We take walk-ins every day of the week now. Office opens at 8:30 am. Walk-inline begins forming around 7:45."
"Thank you, I'll take my chances with that." Here's my catch. I don't have a car and can't get a ride till Thursday morning. So, I'm waiting till then. I don't have a fever yet. Just pain, intermittent nausea, and loss of appetite. I figure I have enough Hydrocodone to manage the pain through Thursday. Since I have to wait anyway, I might as well do it in the comfort of my own home. If I die while waiting there, at least I won't have wet my pants or tried to shoot someone!